Why I am Katie from Bachelorette

Last night I watched Bachelorette on Netflix. I’m so glad I did, because I found a character that is basically me. I am Katie – minus all the coke and Xanax. I’ve complied a small list of why Katie and I are one in the same.

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1. She has red hair. Ok, so this doesn’t mean much, but redheads are pretty rare.

2. She works in retail and hates it. She could probably be doing something way better with her life, but Katie is stuck in a dead-end retail job. I know the feeling, and I know it well. Katie is in her early thirties and works at Club Monaco. I am in my late twenties and work at the Gap. Katie is quoted in the movie saying, “If I am still working retail by the time I’m 40, I will kill myself. I know you guys think I’m joking, but I’m not. I will take a shotgun and I will blow my head off.” I completely understand this sentiment.

3. She has maxed out credit cards. She obviously has a spending problem. Story of my life. Another epic quote:

Reagan: “Ok, how much money do you guys have?”

Katie: “I have 5 maxed out credit cards!”

Gena: “I have a twen- actually, I ripped it. I got nothing.”

Reagan: “Well, that sums up your lives”

4. She is spastic. Ok, I don’t do coke and I’ve never overdosed on Xanax, but I share some of the more tame spastic qualities of Katie. She is flighty, she’s excitable, she doesn’t think before she speaks. She likes to have a good time, but sometimes gets carried away. She is easy to poke fun at. This is me.

I feel like I get Katie. I know where she is coming from. And although I don’t have a drug problem, and I’ve never had sex with a hamburger, I feel like we are similar.

Daily Prompt: In the Summertime

Theoretically, summer will return to the polar-vortex-battered Northern Hemisphere. What are you looking forward to doing this summer? If you’re in the Southern Hemisphere, what are your fondest memories of Summer past?

 

Is summer really coming?! Like, really?

I think so! Today I went for a walk and it was a balmy 10 degrees (Celsius) and the sun. was. shining. Whooooooohooooo!!!!

I am very excited for this summer. Here’s why:

1. We are moving to Toronto for the summer. Ok, I don’t even really like Toronto, I quite hate it actually. But this means that we are moving out of my dad’s house for FOUR WHOLE MONTHS! We will be on our own! Sort of. We are living with a roommate, but she is awesome so it will be fun. She also isn’t one of our parents, and since we’ve been living with our parents for basically the entire duration of our relationship, it will be reallllly swell to be on our own for a while! Plus, we rented this really fancy condo down by the water, so yay for that!

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2. We are taking sailing lessons. YAY! Sailing! We’ve wanted to do this for quite some time now, but never really had the chance. I can’t wait. Jibe, ho!

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3. We will get to go to as many Blue Jays games as we want. My boyfriend and I have had Blue Jays fan passes (I think they are called Ballpark Passes now) for the past three summers now. But last summer we were living in London, so we weren’t able to go to too many games. This summer, however, we will be literally a hop, skip, and a jump from the Rogers Centre. Our condo is practically right next door. We can go to every game if we want! If we are watching a game on TV and it is like reallllly good, we can just go downstairs and walk on over!

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4. I am transferring to a store that is only open Monday-Friday. YAAAAAY. I’m transferring to a Toronto location of my store and it’s only open Monday to Friday. Until 6 pm. Enough said.

I am really, really looking forward to this summer. Only one more month until all the fun begins! :)

Swallowing pills

On my quest to become a real adult, I’ve been trying to do something that most normal adults can do. Swallow big pills.

I learned how to swallow really small pills when I was 14 and I started taking birth control (before that I was mashing them up with a spoon and mixing them with water – ew. Or, I chewed them – ew, ew, ew). Those pills are unbelievably small and when I first started I actually had to put them in a piece of cheese and eat it. After about two weeks I was able to swallow them with water. Most of my friends can swallow theirs without any water, and I still can’t do that. I’ve tried maybe twice and I always end up chugging a bunch of water after because it feels like the tiny pill is stuck in the back of my throat.

Over the years I slowly graduated to bigger pill territory. Those circular red Advils have always been pretty easy for me, but not the long, skinny capsule ones, or the liquid gels. Everyone always says the liquid gels are so easy because they float, but I find them harder to swallow because I put my head back to swallow (I know this doesn’t really help, and in fact, probably makes it harder) so the pill floats the the front of my mouth instead of the back, and then I always end up swallowing the water first and the pill ends up going down with barely any water.

I am clearly ridiculous for not being able to swallow pills, and I’ve struggled with it my whole life. When I had to take capsule pills for a while in high school I was opening them up and just swallowing the tiny beads inside the pills.

Anyways, now at age 26 I can swallow pretty big pills, albeit with difficultly. I put them in my mouth and sit with the water and pill in my mouth for a least a minute usually before I get up the courage to go for a swallow. I tip my head back and just stand there waiting to be brave enough to go for it. I hold on to something for dear life and squeeze when I do take the plunge. Then I usually eat something to make sure they are good and down there.

I know, I am insane. But I’ve gotten a lot better.

But just now, I swallowed TWO of the biggest pills ever. Currently I feel as though they are lodged in my esophagus, even though I’m sure they are not. My chest hurts. I hope they made it to my stomach.

The thing is – why do pills have to be this big? And why do I need to take two? And why isn’t there a liquid format available? (I know there sometimes is, but this is what I had in my house. And no, I didn’t buy them!!!)

Fricken’ leave it to Buckely’s to have the hugest pills on the planet.

WHO CAN SWALLOW THESE THINGS?

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I tried, and ok, I was successful, only because I’ve been suffering a terrible cold the past few days, and while I can deal with the runny nose and congestion, my head has been killing me. I’m sure it’s a sinus headache, but for the past three days I haven’t been able to shake it, and my head is literally splitting. But of course, it’s not enough that I had to take one, but I had to take two! And I will need to take two more before bed! Every 4-6 hours as needed! That is so often! And you can’t even opt to just take one if you want because they are conveniently packaged in little two-packs. UGH. The world is ready for a liquid medication revolution.

But hey, I’m becoming an adult! (My boyfriend said I couldn’t say that because I was wearing my pyjama bottoms with cupcakes on them, and my pill swallowing performance was too “dramatic”.) Whatever.

Elephant torture in Thailand

Elephant torture in Thailand

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I am a huge animal lover, and I especially love elephants. When I saw this today I burst into tears. It’s fairly obvious that wild animals in captivity are mistreated, but I had NO IDEA that this was being done to elephants to tame them for tourist use. It’s sick. It’s twisted. It’s cruel. How any of the people involved in that torture can sleep at night, I do not know. I know I am naive to think that sharing this video will help at all, but please watch this video and share it. At least if more people know, maybe they will stop choosing to ride elephants.

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Travel Literature: My two favourites

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I love travel literature. I love to travel and I love to read, so it makes sense. There are two books that I just love. Love, love, love. And if you love to travel and love to read, I think you will love these books too. Also, if you love to eat. Both of these books have are heavily focused on eating.

The first book is Paris, My Sweet by Amy Thomas. I have sort of a love-hate relationship with Paris, but I can’t help but experience a heightened feeling of love for the city when I read this book. I love desserts, sweets, chocolates, cakes, cookies, more than anything. More than most normal people. More than life itself, perhaps.

I actually read this book between trips to Paris. Once I read it for the first time I made a list of all the treats I had to seek out and eat next time I was in the City of Light. This past August, I found myself on a two-day trip to Paris, for the specific reason of eating as many of the tasty treats I’d read about in this book as I could possibly stomach in 48-hours. (Our original European trip plan only consisted of London, Prague, and Amsterdam, but I managed to cram a short trip to Paris in purely because I wanted to eat!) Thanks to Paris, My Sweet, I ate my way around the city for two blissful days. I really owe so much joy to this book.

The second book I adore, is one that has been sitting on my shelf for about 6 years, unread until recently. I purchased it many moons ago, when my boyfriend first suggested we learn to sail. I bought the book because the story sounded exactly like what we wanted to do one day. Well, our lives got in the way and we never ended up taking sailing lessons, and the book sat, unread on my shelf. I couldn’t bear to read it knowing I was never going to experience such an incredible journey.

Fast forward several years, and we are registered and paid up for our sailing lessons this summer. The first thing I did was pull out the book. An Embarrassment of Mangoes by Ann Vanderhoof.

This book is the ultimate. I swear, it is so well written it just pulls you in and takes you on an adventure. I practically felt like I was there. It was a great read for me, since the book is about a Canadian couple who leave behind their stressful jobs and take off for the Caribbean in their sailboat, with no bluewater cruising experience. That will be me and my boyfriend in 13 years. Reading An Embarrassment of Mangoes just made me want to dream bigger, strive farther, and really work hard to get to a place in our lives where we can do something like that. Learning to sail comes with a TON of fears for me, but reading about Ann’s journey in overcoming many similar fears, filled me with the hope that I can do it too!

Even for non-sailors, this book is a great read, and I’d highly recommend it to anyone who dreams of escaping their daily grind.

So, what kind of books do you enjoy? What is your favourite travel book? I’m always on the lookout for a good book, so if anyone has any suggestions, I’d love to hear them!

Daily Prompt: The Great Pretender

Are you full of confidence or have you ever suffered from Imposter Syndrome? Tell us all about it.

 

Oh my Heavens. I didn’t know what Impostor Syndrome was until today, and having just Wiki’d it, I can say with confidence (oddly enough!) that I suffer from it.

I ski. I try to ski. I’m not very good at skiing. I’m ok I guess. I’m probably better than I think I am. I am definitely better than I think I am. I used to be good. I used to ski fast. Then I took a spill, a blow not only to my head, but my confidence as well. The friends I ski/board with insist that I am a very good skier and that I am capable of much more than I think I am. They get mad at me when I want to stay on the green runs, and when they do see me doing something well they are quick to point out how great I look. They will never let me forget it.

But, I tend not to believe them. I don’t feel very good about what I’m doing. I feel like I spend a lot of time making turns and scrubbing off speed because I get panicky if I start going too fast. Especially if the hill is busy. Especially when there are tiny children around that I could easily kill.

I don’t feel like a very good skier, but I continue to ski year after year. I have a great pair of skis, and all the best ski gear. I’ve spent a lot of money on jackets and helmets and boots and mittens and goggles, and I definitely LOOK the part. I look the part in the chalet, and as soon as we get on the hill, I think it’s fairly obvious that I am an amateur.

Who knows when, or if, this will all change. I used to really love skiing. Now I feel like I suck at it, and it’s starting to make skiing a bit of a nightmare. I am a total pretender, because I love telling people I ski, regaling folks with my trips to the mountain, and partaking in après-ski activities, but when it comes right down to it, I suck.